Thursday, March 29, 2012

A Blog Entry About Nothing

I meditate daily.  My meditations can sometimes last from one to two hours at a time.  I sometimes mediate twice a day.  Needless to say, in that amount of time a lot seems to happen, or sometimes not.  Lately when I meditate I have found it difficult to connect to my “voice”.  Meditating and what happens during meditation is so personal and usually involves no words, so as I write this, I am using secondary explanations for primary ones.  I sometimes channel during my meditation, which is a lot like tapping a vein and connecting in such a way that words, ideas and feelings coming from Source Energy (or whomever) just flow through me.  I write furiously, never really knowing what is written until I look back on it days later.  On other occasions, I write stories or ideas from a feeling or delve into my imagination while meditating and see where that goes and what I come up with.  There are many, many variables and I really dislike giving everything a label, but suffice to say that a lot of creative, intuitive “stuff” goes on.  Then there is the place of “Nothing/Everything” when I meditate.  I loose the boundary of my body with a feeling of expansion.  It’s a sense of spreading out in all directions. In this space there are neither questions to be asked nor any to be answered.  It is a place of being.  I have been spending a lot of time in that space lately and not moving from there.  I go up to the attic and gently whisper “Hello?  Hello?” but I sense nothing.  The space is cleared and all I see is a shaft of light coming through a window onto a cleaned floor.  All seems quiet inside me and I feel a bit stuck, like there is no movement.  I am not connecting the way I usually do and I am finding it rather curious.  Not being able to connect enough to even write a blog entry is unusual and reminds me of the show Seinfeld.  The whole premise of Seinfeld was a “show about nothing”.  At least that’s how Larry David termed his concept but when you truly look at the episodes, it was hardly a show about nothing but on the contrary, his shows were filled to the brim with plots and subplots.  So I’m sitting here trying to figure out what to write and I’m feeling a lot like Mr. David in that I’m not coming up with anything or so it seems.  Is it possible to write an entry about nothing?  I think not.  Even nothing is something.  So I go back over my notes from the last few days to see if there is anything that I can share … possibly a feeling or thought that others can relate to and here is what I find.  In one of my most recent meditations I asked; “Why am I feeling this void?”  This is the response I wrote down; “That’s just where you are.  All is well.  You are at a place where you have cleared out a lot.  Don’t be afraid of that space or try and fill it with “stuff”.  Just let it be.  There will always be movement, expansion, and change.  Just be with what is right now even if it feels like nothing.  A lot comes out of just being.  After a while something will come along and spark your attention.  Till then, don’t push.  There is no pressure.  Moments like this are good.  They are the pause before the movement.  The in breath before the out breath.  It’s the simple rhythm of the universe.  Don’t judge it.”  And there you have it.  My blog entry about nothing with a little bit of something thrown in.  Maybe it’s a contraction before the push?  Who knows … we’ll see.


  1. Ahh Nothing - No-thing - great space to be - great place to experience --- enjoy! Give thanks!

  2. Deb, A place of "nothingness" is a brief reprieve from having to expend any energies on anything! I, myself would truly welcome a bit of nothingness, every once in a while. Sometimes it is nice to just sit back and watch the clouds roll by. Actually, this jogs my memory to this past Wednesday. I was trying to get myself to exactly that mode, as I was feeling a bit overwhelmed with the previous 12 days. It was a particularly dark, dreary, cold day. My first day back to work in nearly two weeks. The sky was dark grey, like the color of slate. Then in a brief moment, tremendous thunder and lightning and the sky opened to pour copious amounts of rain. I opened the door, as I wanted to listen to the birds who were all perched in the dogwood, just outside the kitchen window. There was a chorus of birds singing, everso loudly. At that very moment, the rain turned to hail, the size of marbles. Lots and lots of hail! It covered the ground, with what was a thick coating of what resembled mothballs. After a bit, the heavy rain returned, causing the hail to be pushed to the side as the rain made its way toward the drains, forming a painting in black and white along the asphalt. I reached out the door to grab a handful of hail, so that Maeve and Thomas could feel what it felt like. They were truly amazed at what it looked like. A short time later, we were walking toward the car. It was funny to watch as Maeve and Thomas were crunching the hail under foot, or kicking it to the side and watching it roll. To hear their squeals of delight as they experienced this unexpected phenomena. Who knows, when or if even, another experience like this will ever present itself, but it was a brief moment, I was taken away from all my troubles and given a bit of time to experience the world through the eyes of a child. It's moments like this, that give me pause to be thankful for these unexpected gifts. God's way of saying "I have created this day for you! It will bring you Joy and much laughter." It did!!